by Cynthia Germain

Recently, several friends have shared the heartache of saying goodbye to their furry friends. It’s a pain many of us know all too well. It suddenly gets too quiet…the absence of paws running through the house or the warmth of them curled up beside you. As we grow older, these losses can feel different, heavier somehow, perhaps because the love we lose is so unconditionally given. It’s a richness that only comes from time with these very special companions.

Pets occupy a unique corner of our lives. They don’t care if we’ve had a bad day or made a mistake. They meet us at the door with wagging tails or “kitty chatter” just the same. So when we lose them, it’s not just the loss of someone special, it’s the loss of a love that was always there, asking for so little in return.

For those of us who have reached a certain stage in life, the bond with a pet can take on even greater meaning. As children go out on their own, as friends move away or pass on, and as the pace of life begins to slow, the presence of a furry friend is a constant source of comfort and connection. They become part of the fabric of our days, from the morning rituals of feeding and walking to the quiet evenings spent together. When they’re gone, it’s not just their presence that we miss, it’s also the rhythms that they helped to create.

For some, the loss is complicated by a deeper question: Should I get another dog or cat, knowing how much it will hurt to say goodbye again? And for older adults, that question often becomes even more layered: Am I too old to care for another pet? What would happen if I became unable to care for them or if I passed away before them? These are not easy questions, but they are worth exploring.

Some people create care plans for their pets, ensuring that a trusted person will step in if needed. Others choose to adopt older pets, offering them comfort in their later years and finding companionship that doesn’t require a decade-long commitment.

There is no doubt that navigating this type of loss is a very personal journey. Welcoming a new furry friend into our lives is certainly one option and a decision not taken lightly as they do rely on us to make their lives rich as well.

As we ponder this, there are other ways to help cope and heal. Planting a tree or flowers in their memory, creating a photo album, or donating to a local animal shelter in their honor can bring a sense of purpose to the grief.

For some, sharing stories with friends and family can offer comfort. Others find joy in volunteering with animals, at a shelter or through fostering. Engaging in creative projects, like painting or crafting something that reminds you of your pet, or taking walks in places you once enjoyed together, can also be therapeutic.

As we find our way through these losses, it’s important to keep a hold of the place our furry friend had in our lives. Caring for them somehow makes us more human. In their passing, we are reminded of how we love and are loved in return. So let’s enjoy them while they are here, remember them when we are gone, and let their lessons permeate all the relationships in our lives.